Take Your Own Pulse

Most doctors do, indeed, have senses of smell. Mine happens to be particularly sensitive. So if you just laid a massive fart in your hospital room 30 seconds before I walk in to examine you, yes, I will notice. I may also later make a blog post about the eye-watering smell I encountered, and how I was noticeably breathing through my mouth during the first 10 minutes of the H&P. I will, however, refrain from commenting on what may have died in your room, or inquiring what you may have eaten, or singing any of my favorite bits of the "Diarrhea" song. You're welcome.